The Curse of the Wonderphobes

My friend Skinny is what you might call an individual. He is to most onlookers, a man apart. What most people see in him as mystery and a sort of aloof charm, I have come to know as shyness and a slight agoraphobic tendancy to fear public ridicule. As a result, he stands near the wall, smiling only occasionally and cracking only as many jokes as he needs to fulfill the minimum quota of social participation. In short, he narrowly avoids freakhood but is purposely forgettable to all those who don't know him personally. That said, this man is magnificent. He's good looking, talented, funny, charming, honest, witty, and extremely intelligent. So why, (as many of you girls are probably wondering) does he fy under the radar and escape your notice? Because I believe, somehow, he knows his potential and is afraid to be who he is. Because one thing I and many other Wonderphobes have learned, is that while people might shun imperfection, those that rise above are often hated and criticized even more.

Now, let's jump to another example. Dice, I pray you won't hate me for this but I've been thinking about it for a while. I have this adorable friend who is completely perfect for the role of Goldilocks as written by Stephen Sondheim in the 1980's. She's tiny, blonde, fashionable, and owns more shoes than most people have underwear. Enough said. As such, she is plagued by certain stereotypes, which I will now hasten to explode. Some people would take one look at her and others like her and immediately remark on their fashion, looks, ability to fit into the world around them so stylishly while inspiring trends and being effortless fashionistas for others to copy, role models of pop culture, doctors of the latest trends in music, etc etc ad nauseum. And sometimes, for many of these girls it is easiest to just go along with and encourage this image, because it seems to be what they do best. But not Dice. She not only happens to be one of the cutest and most fashionable girls I know, but (don't let this shock you) she is also one of the smartest. And I don't mean to sound elitist, but I know a lot of very smart people. Unfortunately, I don't think she sees herself in the same light that I do, because just like many of us, she chooses not to aknowledge her own brilliance. As one of my favorite lecturers Marianne Williamson said,

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the World. There is nothing enlightening about shrinkingso that other people won’t feel unsure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. As we let our own Light shine,we consciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear,our presence automatically liberates others."

So, for the Wonderphobes of the world, (myself included) I say that whatever is holding us back, whether it be a fear of physical, mental, spiritual, interpersonal, or miscellanious perfection, we need to let it go. And just feel free to be Wonderful.